Observations Of A Lubbock Trip
posted by Krayon Scribbel on May 13, 2002
So, I spent the weekend in the ever so beautiful city of Lubbock, Texas for my sister's wedding, and have a few observations about the region.
1) John Cougar Mellencamp: Apparently, JCM is a revered God once one crosses over the Eden TX city limits. Every city from there to Lubbock had a JCM song playing. No, EVERY CITY. I expected a slew of typically bad 70's Bachman Turner Overdrive-esque tunes on the radio, but ol' John stood above all in bad redundancy. Made for a fun song guessing game once Emily's Gameboy ran out of juice, though.
2) Golf Courses: Every 1000 populated ditchwater shithole town from Eden to Lubbock has a friggin' golf course at the edge of the city limits. This promted Emily and I to wonder, do they think that they'll get a PGA tour to blow through and put them on the map, or are there "golf dads" that are "gonna get their boys on the circuit!!!"? I guess high school football has become passe. Or is it that John Cougar Mellencamp is an avid golf fan?
3) Thug teens: What city would be complete without the gathering of Ford Bronco and Camaro driving mullet heads at the Town and Country quicky mart to stare down the ne'er do wells that pass through to buy gas and cold Cokes? They put us in our place; we will NEVER drive through their towns again without either sporting a mullet, cranking John Cougar Mellencamp tunes from the car while pumping gas, or both.
4) Dust Devils: There's nothing like the excitement of seeing the ground next to your car swell up into a turbulent ball of hell dust and sweep across the road in front of you (especially when you're doing 95 mph). Gives one's car a delightful brown grit hue as well. Just makes one wonder, ain't that America?
Other than that (and by far the most vile, disgusting motel stay I've ever had), the trip was uneventful. My sister is now Mrs. Roger Terry, the family is doing well, and when we got back, the dogs were happy to see us. All in all, a fairly decent weekend.